Temporary

My mother said to me the other day that an experience such as this makes one question life's purpose. I wanted to say to her that I have been questioning life's purpose ever since I can remember; instead, I just listened.

What this experience magnifies for me is how everything is temporary. I suppose this is where the concept of Carpe Diem becomes meaningful. But what does it mean to seize the day? It certainly does not imply I shrug off my responsibilities and run off in search of something more fantastical; this would be too much like a romance novel or ABCfamily movie--simply unrealistic.

It seems the meaning of Carpe Diem is contextual. For me I think it means enjoying my children even when I have no idea how to stop an almost three year old from running away from me after screaming "No" in my face as I carry her four month old brother who begins to cry because he is hungry. Often I have heard parents say, "This stage or behavior is temporary." So is my time with them. Before I know it, they will make a life away from me. My relationship with them will become a lower priority. Everything is temporary.

Everything is temporary, even the pain I endure as I watch my father die and my mother wonder why she struggles to cope. My mother fears the temporary; it means life as she has come to know it will forever be changed. If I prayed, I would pray for my mom to embrace the concept of Carpe Diem. The only thing I can do is try to embrace it myself. This too is only temporary.